Well, it has finally happened: I officially strayed this week to the point of no return. Was it...
a)...the cake? No exaggeration - I ate chocolate, vanilla, walnut, brownies, burnt, blueberry, lemon, and ice cream cake this week. Burnt? You say? Yes - I unsuccessfully made cupcakes for my upcoming party, but did not throw them out. Instead, Adam and I have been nibbling away at the good parts.
b)...the lack of exercise? Only went to the gym twice this week, and haven't walked since Tuesday.
c)...the margaritas? With extra strong tequila?
d)...all of the above??
I think you know the answer.
However, it is Sunday morning, and I have a renewed sense of purpose in this weight loss thing. I returned to my old habits last week, and I realized that I am not ready yet. For the last few weeks, I have been very happy that I managed to achieve half my goal, but the fact is I still do not fit into the range on those blasted charts which tell me how much I should weigh. I do not ever remember fitting into the range on those charts. Quitting now will only make me have to start ALL OVER again. Again. (I have been attempting to reverse my natural cake consuming character unsuccessfully for years...)
You know, I blame the cake for my plateau, and that certainly has had its affect, but the real reason is that I have been HAPPY with myself. It is an extremely bitter catch-22. (At least in my experience), one must feel BAD about oneself before making a lifestyle change. To achieve motivation, I have to look at my lumpy legs and extended belly, or try on clothes of a size I wish would fit. Now how poopy is that?
Well, I am going to try something new - be happy with myself, and strive to change. Is it possible??? We shall see.