De-toxifying

Glog, I've been forced to ground myself for a few days, resolving to never drink again again.  This past Saturday, Indiana hosted Penn State football in Washington, DC.  (It's some ploy by NFL stadiums to convince universities that they will increase enrollment by traveling around the country.)

Naturally, since my house is only 1.5 hours' drive from DC, the family roosted at my little nest before heading down to Fed Ex Field.  And, naturally, we had a few cold ones.  My diet for the day (to the best of my recollection):

• one cupcake topped with cute little caramel turkeys with pretzel legs, stuffed with more cake crumbs, and sitting on a bed of green cornflakes that looked like lettuce.  Very cute, and very caramel-y.
• four to five cookies of various flavors and sizes
• one piece of pumpkin spice flavored sticky bun
• one moderately sized brownie
• one mystery dessert which I will deem a "maple bar"
• a few bites of crab dip on crackers
• a test bite of taco-flavored ground beef which looked like it was something made of brown sugar
• one slice of spice cake with orange glaze

I think that about sums it up.  All of this was consumed before 11am, and, you will note, was carefully orchestrated to eliminate nearly all nutritional value from the system. The family fried a turkey, and made all the trimmings including mashed potatoes, corn, and green bean casserole - but I was a stuffed bird.

Top my buffet with several shots of Canadian whiskey and several more cans of domestic swill known to vast majorities of the population as beer, and you get a small glimpse of my state of mind later in the evening.  (And if you did happen to glimpse my state of mind?  Please let me know how awful it was.  Because I can only assume - very.)

After a brief time passed out napping in the car, I was returned to my sofa, where I took in about six hours of shut eye.  And then, for some reason, I didn't feel very well and ended up thinking about how I could have cleaned the toilet last Thursday instead of watching TV.

I hate when I have to ground myself before holidays.  My goal for Thanksgiving is to remember to eat a vitamin or two, and to keep the correct end pointed at the porcelain.  Wish me luck!