Friday, July 17, 2009

CLARGRO-Cleaning my Innards

Ok, karma*. I am not sure what (more) I did to piss you off, but I really thought losing my GPS suction thingie was enough. Really, I love a Friday afternoon nap like the next girl, but it's a bit wasted when one is just trying to forget the pain.

It all started with aforementioned but undefined "Operation Regain Sanity". The actual details are fairly dull, but the basic point is to motivate myself to do things when I can rather than procrastinate, because I am not home often enough to make "doing it tomorrow" a viable option. When possible, I CLAGRO Clean**. You know, I Cook larger amounts of food and store them, I do LAundry, including folding and putting away, I GROcery shop, and I clean the house and/or litter box. Fun Fun. This is the Baltimore Branch (BB) of the Operation.

The Raleigh/Airport Branch (RAB) serves as strategic support for the BB. When here, I plan for the CLAGRO by productively making lists. A side mission of ORS is to Save Money. Airport food? Costs $12, minimum. Even if you only get a salad. And don't get me started on the bills one might receive if she were inclined to sit at a bar for five hours out of sheer boredom, playing those little video games they have now. I wouldn't know.***

So, I brilliantly decided to purchase all my food in Raleigh at a grocery store I found. I stopped in on the way to the office and was immediately side tracked because they sell wine in the grocery stores in North Carolina. I selected a lovely Pinot Grigio before returning to task, when I bought meals for both lunches and both dinners. (The hotel serves breakfast.) I ate my first lunch, a turkey sandwich.

Then my plans were shattered. I returned to the hotel with my dinners and wine, and remembered that this hotel totally rocks and they host a happy hour from 5-7pm, including light fare. That night, they were serving chili (my favorite food), and free beer (my favorite kind). I had two bowls of chili and two beers. I did not go to the hotel gym and run on the treadmill as originally planned. Instead, I went to front desk to see if anyone might have a corkscrew for my impulse buy. They did not. They told me how to drive to a nearby store which probably sells them, but a) I had downed my two beers too fast to consider getting into the bubble car safely, and b) I would (presumably) not be able to take my purchase home on the plane. Oh yeah, and c) I probably shouldn't drink an entire bottle of wine by myself. I walked back up to my hotel room devising plans to drink two glasses (about half) tonight, then chug the other two glasses after dropping off the rental car but before getting on the plane. I hate to see good alcohol wasted, but I felt this was too alcoholic-y. So I walked to a bar where I saw a girl wasting five hours drinking and playing video games. It wasn't me, I swear. I did not drink, I mean eat, my dinner.

Lunch the next day. I brought the wine to the office and tried to give it away, but it may have been easier to give away a stray cat with missing fur patches and three legs. Now I see why the stuff was on sale. No one there drinks it! I ate the dinner from the night before, and put the extra meal in the freezer for next time. The chicken seemed a little undercooked, but I dismissed it.

Dinner at 17:00 DST, July 15. I ate my remaining meal, a salad, which clearly said "Use by July 17" on the label. The top was fine, but as I neared the bottom, I found some icky, slimy bits.

Constant Readers, I think you see where this is going. Lets just say I blame one of the two culprits, chicken or salad, for the night I had last night. So. Much. Pain. I read my book from about 3am 5:30am to keep the owies away. It is now 3:34pm, (15:34 DST) and I still don't feel right. And now I have to clean the bathroom again. Or was that too much information?


*Or should I say CAR-ma? I did not think of this witty twist until I had already posted my last entry. I'm a bit disappointed with myself.
**The military is all about their acronyms, yo. I once made the mistake of joining a volleyball team with a bunch of Coast Gaurd military wannabees, and they were all, "Hey wanna GLU at the WEEBLE?" Whatever.
***$35.00. At $2 a drink and 20 game credits for a fiver.


Liz Baer said...

I thought of the "Car-ma" witticism as I was reading the last post, and I thought I might comment on it, but then I forgot.

As someone who (used to) work in deli's, I would advise getting salads made fresh or making your own at the store's salad bar. The reason being (and I'm not necessarily saying this store does it, but it is easy to do) that if it is an item made in the store, they can make the sell-by date whatever they want.

Danielle Mari said...

I had the same July-17-Salad-Shim-Sham!! I was so looking forward to salad after rehearsal... then... GOO. I'm so glad I didn't eat mine :( Sorry you did :(

Jessica said...

Welcome to my life here in southern VA... minus the food poisoning. Your acronym fits my life on weekends. Though I've stopped making dinners and lunches for the week and instead shop at the grocery store when I get down here... I even have their discount card now! I miss Baltimore! :(

We need to meet up in the south!