I had thought that being unemployed would suck, but at the very least, it would allow me a bunch of free time. So far, there could be nothing further from the truth (on the free time part - the rest of it still sucks.) Each day, I have risen from bed in a near panic, thinking of the resumes I need to send, the web page I need to update, the lunches I have scheduled, the interviews I should prepare for, the taxes I should pay, the health care coverage I should look into, the OBama subsidies I might be eligible for, the laundry I should do, the gym classes I should take advantage of while I can, the people I should call, the car that needs washing. Oh yeah, and the trip to Seattle I need to pack for. The past two weeks have been nothing but a frenzy.
Today, I finally had a chance to breathe, so I figure it is as good a time as any to tell y'all about my new diet. This was adopted one week before I was laid off, and though it is called "UltraMetabolism", I am torn on calling it "The Caveman Diet" or "The Hippie Diet". The Caveman Diet seems to fit because I am eating nothing but whole foods - no processed foods like Doritos or Tastykakes allowed. If my ancestor 10000 years ago couldn't eat it, then I shouldn't either. The Hippie Diet also seems to fit because I have to go to a lot of hippie stores like Trader Joes, Whole Foods, and Wegmans to buy this wacko food.
Already, I have made modifications to the plan. My book gives a menu broken down by day which includes different things each day for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and two snacks - all of these are small meals of 300 calories or less and I eat every three hours. Most recipes make 2 to 4 servings, so I have created a similar menu with less variety. Despite this, I found myself purchasing escarole, watercress, mixed greens, AND spinach. (These are all basically just lettuce, but they cost more.) I also had to purchase quinoa, amaranth, and wheat groats. (These are all basically just grains, but they cost more.) In the case of amaranth, they are also extremely difficult to find, even in a hippie store, and I gave up on finding "wheat groats". I was also unable to locate fresh figs, and gave up on dried figs as well. I figure they are close enough to plums, they just cost more.
My grocery bill for week #1 was $130. Week #2 was also $130. But I felt wonderful. I never once had a craving for...anything. I managed to stick to the diet at restaurants, and I remained calorically satisfied without counting calories! Freedom! But, then I went to Seattle. Mostly, I did manage to stick with the diet, but there were some places that had nothing but burgers and fries on the menu. There were also days when I was forced to put getting on a plane on time ahead of my need to eat every three hours.
Today, I begin anew (again). Due to my current situation, I created a budget for the groceries - though I am sure I was getting a variety of nutrients from the many forms of leafy greens, I had to prioritize. And luckily, I still had some quinoa and amaranth left over from previous weeks. Isn't it sad that it costs so much to eat healthy? I noticed that boxes of mac n' cheese sell 3 for a $1. Unfortunately, if it came down to paying the rent or opting for ramen noodles, I'd have to take the noodles.
4 comments:
Wait--- does that mean no tabasco!?
Does this all have to do with your String Pasta Incident?
Because my book does not specifically mention Tabasco, I have made the executive decision to allow it. However, the pasta (unless it is the wheat variety) is not allowed. Not to worry. Tabasco may be safely used on just about everything but cake and cereal.
I'm sorry, you lost me at no Tastykakes.
I think cavemen ate burgers...they were just of the dinosaur variety
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