My Two Cents

I am not a movie person. I do not remember the names of actors or actresses, I do not rush out to see every blockbuster, and in many cases, I do not stay awake to see the ends of many sagas. As a general rule, I am very very bad at the “Kevin Bacon” game. This is nothing new, and I am generally ok with it. However, there are several movies I have not seen which earn comments from amazed friends and acquaintances. These usually go something like this: “What? You haven’t seen that? Are you sure you’re American?” Rest assured, I am, indeed, American. But, I have not seen:

-The Karate Kid

-Rambo

-any of the Godfather movies

-Gone with the Wind

-Maverick

-the list goes on and on...

All of these were immensely popular for their time, but I just never got around to watching them. So, I recently added “Braveheart” to my Netflix queue in order to rectify at least one of my deficiencies. I cannot say I was all that impressed. First of all, this movie is three hours long and it was extremely hard for me to block out a chunk of time sufficient for the full viewing. (In fact, I did put this movie in the VCR back in 1999 but never got past the half hour marker…) Now that I have watched the film, I can say with confidence that there is entirely too much slow motion. It sometimes took nearly 5 minutes for men on horses to ride 50 yards. Is this supposed to be dramatic effect? I found it annoying. And speaking of horses…

…There are many scenes involving the killing or serious injury to horses. Poor horsies. They are just innocents in the conflict. There is even one scene where a horse jumps out of a 4 story building into a body of water. Who cares if Mel Gibson survived, what about the horse? And speaking of Mel Gibson…

…Is he aware of how old he is? OK, so his love interest in the movie is shown in a flashback scene in which Mel is played by a 12 or 13 year old kid, and she is played by a 7 or 8 year old kid. The difference in age is like 5 years, right? So then, we flash forward and Mel is nearly twice the age of this 20-something girl. And while we’re on that topic…

…How is it that she is still not married when Mel returns from his travels after 10 years? This is supposed to take place in 1345. Didn’t people get married at age 14 back then? (Of course, then the age difference makes more sense.) It just seems pretty convenient to me. And one other thing…

…Of course she is the most beautiful girl in the village. She is the only one who cleans/combs her hair. I think the writers went to extremes to show the differences in class of people by their dress/hygiene. But only with the men. Apparently, the women of all classes still managed to make it to the beauty parlor on a daily basis.

OK, now I got that out. Despite the above ranting, I did not hate the movie. I just don't see what all the hype was about. I did appreciate that it did not have the sappy Hollywood ending in which everyone who was going through a ton of turmoil is suddenly ok, saved by some amazing coincidence. I appreciated also that the bad guys did not hang over their victim saying "I'm gonna kill ya!" for ten minutes, allowing the hero sufficient time to swoop in for a "dramatic" rescue. I also enjoyed Mel Gibson's ability to convey emotion without speaking. His portrayal of hurt when he is betrayed by a noble of his own clan is great - no words need to be spoken (though, of course, this part is in slow motion...) He also has awesome expressions of passion and love in his eyes throughout the movie.

But that is just my two cents. I am not sure I want to see The Godfather. Next on my queue: Monty Python skits. Now how did that get to the top?

Love the Gym You're In

Joining a gym seemed like such a cliche decision, tied to an overwhelming desire to emulate Dilbert with my office job, sedentary lifestyle, and overall geekiness. I hesitated for a while, giving all sorts of excuses for sitting on my bum for hours each night. Deep down, I knew that "heavy lifting" should consist of more than reaching into my chip bag and scooping large amounts of salsa into my mouth. (Who am I kidding? There is no way I would manage not to drop salsa all over myself...) The best reasons I found not to join a gym were that 1) It is too expensive, and 2) I can work out my self by jogging around the block, or getting exercise videos.
Lets start with that second one, shall we? Every couple of months, I found bursts of energy and motivation in which I diligently put on my sneakers after work and ran. These bursts lasted a few days...once. Most times, it was a singular and exceedingly rare event. I also attempted several workout videos which had varying affects on the destruction of my apartment. If you work out in your living room, you need a little more room and a bit less living (the cat is definitely not a fan of workout videos, yet seems to think that lying down two feet behind me is a good idea.) At that time, I also lived in an apartment with paper thin walls, and apparently floors. The clock rattled on the wall every time Richard Simmons told me to shake my caboose. (And yes, I did attempt a Richard Simmons video. It was hilarious!)
OK, on to the other reason for not joining a gym: the $$$$$. I am not saying that gyms are cheap, or that I suddenly got a ginormous raise. But, like everything, it is about priorities. I pay the same for a gym membership (and probably less) than most people pay for cable TV. I ditched the TV, and I haven't really missed it much - I get my South Park from the internet, I get my movies and TV series from Netflix, and I don't mind watching Seinfeld reruns for the 500th time. (Well, Hellllooooo...wha ha ha...)
I do love the gym. I do all the group exercise classes because they motivate me to commit to a specific time, and because they are fun. On Thursdays (today) I do an extremely hard boxing class, which kicks my ass weekly. But I love it, and most of the other regulars do too. I feel great when it is over, and on more than one occasion I have rearranged my social schedule or even skipped out on fun things in order to go to this class. I have also done this for my Saturday morning class - in fact, it is amazing that I regularly attend a Saturday morning class. That one is called "Body Attack" and it is technically aerobics, but for non coordinated people like me. I hate "traditional" aerobics in which I am too busy trying to figure out the moves to break a sweat.
The moral of the story: get out there and MOVE! Find something that works for you, and make it a priority. It feels really great to do something for yourself, and it makes you feel better all day!